I’ve done just enough this weekend to get a few things caught up – dishes and laundry. The two never-ending household chores that can’t be left to chance…
But it felt good. Its nice to have cleaned off counters and full dressers. Other chores will get taken care of this week as my energy comes back – and I’m really trying to “take it easy” the way that I should.
Honestly, there have been really sweet moments with my family this weekend – and really sorrowful moments, too. I’m one to want to “mark” milestones in my life, so my husband and I are talking about ways to have a simple memorial service of sorts to commemorate the loss of our baby. Maybe we’re going to plant something to keep – we haven’t talked it all out yet – but I need something.
I had a memorial service as part of my recovery from my abortion and have a small child’s New Testament with my baby’s name inscribed on it. I don’t want to do the same thing here, but I want it to be something memorable and sweet. I know it won’t always hurt so bad – so I want something tangible like that. If any of you have any suggestions – we are definitely open to them.
If you have experienced or know someone who has experienced miscarriage or pregnancy loss and memorialized it in some sweet way, please feel free to share it.
In the meantime, I am making my home sing today by playing the Twila Paris CDs I copied to my iTunes on my computer. I can turn it on and it plays in the background while we do what needs done. Click the link below to hear the song that really speaks to me right now.
Maybe it will speak to you, too.
About Debbie T
Welcome to my blog. Grab a latte and settle in for a good read! I'm Debbie - aka The Queen Mommy. I'm really just a Right-Brained woman who loves God, her husband, and her three children. I This means I'd rather write than clean... I enjoy writing about family & home, faith & life, marriage & parenting, food & addiction. I do participate in affiliate programs and use affiliate links and graphics throughout my blog. If you follow a link and make a purchase, I may make a small commission to help support my family at home. Click here for my Disclosure Policy.
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I’m sorry. I just came across your blog for the first time. When did you have the abortion? and the miscarriage?
I had a miscarriage in May 2009. It’s a great loss.
Contact me,
Tami
I found your blog on Nan’s site while I was reading “Making Your Home Sing.” I read your post and am amazed by how open you were about the pain of losing a child. Thankfully I have never gone through that, but I know your testimony will be a light to others as you share your heart.
May I share something with you that I think will bring you some healing and will give you peace? I don’t know if you’re familiar with the book “A Divine Revelation of Heaven” by Mary Kay Baxter, but this is a very well know book. God gave Mary Baxter a vision of Hell and a vision of Heaven and told her to share it with the world. Thousands of people have been saved through her testimony. But what I wanted to share with you was the chapter on what happens to children when they die. God allowed her to see this and when I hear it, it just brings me to tears of joy every time. He cares for every soul, and takes care of them in Heaven. You can hear someone reading this chapter aloud on youtube…here’s the web address. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V7-I7TAxd2E&feature=related
Please let me know what you think. I believe you’ll be blessed!
Please
I am so sorry to hear of your loss. I know how painful it is.
We lost our little one when I was four months along. We did two things: in the spring, we planted a rose in the garden. Each of our family members have picked out a rose that they like and it’s been planted, so we picked and planted a rose for the baby too (it was a Betty Boop rose).
Another thing was what my hubby did on the due date. He previously arranged for my parents to take the kids for the night.
So on the day that would have been our due date (it happened to be a Friday) he took me out to dinner, and then, as a surprise, he took me to see Stars on Ice.
Then we went out for breakfast the next morning (Saturday), and he said we could do whatever I wanted for the day, then we picked up the boys that evening.
Losing a baby at any time is hard, but we had tried for five years to conceive and so when we lost it, I felt particularly devastated because it had taken so long. I knew it wasn’t like I could get pregnant so quickly again.
So the day that my hubby planned was a wonderful way of just distracting me, but also turning a painful memory of what that day could/should have been, into a lovely day and memory of my husband’s love. Plus, that night we had a lovely reunion with our children!
Thank you for linking up, my friend, and feel free to email me anytime you want to talk about it.
I, myself, just had a miscarriage in May. I have kept all of the ultrasound photos and even the positive pregnancy test, but right now it is too painful to think beyond that.
My younger sister just gave birth to a stillborn baby girl and I have decided to present her with a memory box- in this case, a simple wooden box with the name that they had chosen for their little girl carved on the lid- that she can put the baby’s pictures, handprints, footprints, ultrasound DVD and a few of the little clothes that they had already bought for her in it to keep. I know that it will be painful at fisrt, but I hope that she will find comfort in it in the years to come.