Living with Addiction. Living with an Addict.

I’ve written about my Food Addiction before, and you can find my posts about it in my Queen Size Mommy section.

But I also live with an addict.

An addict whose choices have affected every aspect of our home and family.

While I walk a fine line of choosing NOT to air out dirty laundry and be as honest as I can, it’s necessary to talk about how addiction has affected my life and my marriage.  I do not write this to be disparaging – but honestly because I know if I live with this, I am NOT the only one.  And so often being the wife of an addict is very isolating and draining.

I do not write this to engage sympathy, because I have my own issues and I have my own dysfunctional behaviors that contribute to the problems in my life and in my marriage.

However, the problems that arise from being married to an addict are often confusing and difficult to navigate.

On one hand, I’m supposed to be a submissive wife.  Scripture clearly indicates this truth.  Repeatedly.

On the other hand, how can I enable the behaviors that help him live so easily in his addiction?  Submission often contributes to these behaviors…  And yet there are no excuses in Scripture.

It’s a very fine line and it’s been one I have been dancing on for years.

It requires great wisdom and Scripture says if we want wisdom to ask of God.  I have been asking and begging for change.  I have been asking God to change me and even railing against the fact that after great personal struggle and transformation, there were no changes in my husband.

And his addiction continues.

One thing I do know is that nothing comes into my life – of my own doing and consequence, or of anyone else’s – that does not pass through God’s Hand.  And ultimately, His Will prevails.

Another thing I know is that God always seeks redemption.  Always.  He is relentless in His pursuit of a personal, intimate relationship with every single human being, and because I know that, I have to trust that God wants that just as much for my husband as he does for me.  Or you.

I have studied addiction.  I have studied God’s Word.  And I have a God who is greater than Impossible.

While my husband pursues recovery – finally – and while I pursue my own walk with God – for that IS the only “cure” – it is a hard road to travel.  I don’t feel like blogging.  I don’t feel like eating.  I don’t feel like showering or lifting my head off the pillow sometimes.  I don’t feel like being a mom at times.

But God knows what I need, and my prayer is that He will direct my steps every day.  And bring redemption to my family.

About Debbie T

Welcome to my blog. Grab a latte and settle in for a good read! I'm Debbie - aka The Queen Mommy. I'm really just a Right-Brained woman who loves God, her husband, and her three children. I This means I'd rather write than clean... I enjoy writing about family & home, faith & life, marriage & parenting, food & addiction. I do participate in affiliate programs and use affiliate links and graphics throughout my blog. If you follow a link and make a purchase, I may make a small commission to help support my family at home. Click here for my Disclosure Policy.

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