The past several weeks have really been full of unscheduled, unplanned surprises. Not all of them were bad. Not all of them were difficult. I think Roy and I both feel like some things are starting to swing upward again and feeling some relief from a lot of pressure we’ve been trying to survive.
Living in the MOMent is a big challenge for me. I’m usually thinking about something that happened yesterday, or wondering about something that might happen tomorrow. Being STILL – in THIS very moment requires more focus and peace than I have allowed myself to develop. And yet, so many things in my life are urging me – reminding me – to do so.
In fact, I’ve been seriously contemplating (again) just up and quitting my blogging and writing altogether. That seems entirely foreign to me in some sense because I have identified myself as a writer. But when the going gets tough, writing is one of the things that gets shoved aside so I can deal with the crisis or situation that arises.
What I’m hoping to learn is to not just LIVE for the next crisis. Not to just RISE to the occasion. But to be prepared – and peaceful – about whatever arises each MOMent of every day. And that requires some quiet time, some planning on paper, and some practicing new habits.
My Quiet Time – my Bible study time – has been inconsistent, if existent at all. I’ve had several opportunities for group Bible studies, and have enjoyed them – but having MY personal quiet time with God has been less of a commitment. So, I’m starting there.
My Family Time – I have been working to be more present in the moments with my husband and children. Focused on EACH of them, not just the compilation of family members – and praying for them, remembering them through the day, and loving them as much as I can. Serving them – well, I’m still challenged to humble myself and love them in that way, but God is working that out in me still.
My Home Time – oh, my house is starting to come together. It always goes into complete chaos and then somehow, this Flylady-Phoenix-Mom arises from the ashes and piles of laundry, and I find my rhythm again. I’m getting there. Getting things put onto paper, and out of my head, so I can manage what needs managed in a less stressful, crazy way. My house will never be white-glove clean – but knowing where things are, having some semblance of order is coming together and I feel less panicked about it. I’m trying to fit my primary “chores” into 2 days instead of spreading them out over 4, so it has been challenging, but I’m getting there.
My Writing Time – is starting to find its place in my life, as well, and I’m feeling less like giving up and more like scaling back while still enjoying what I love. I’ve been doing a LOT more reading and it has helped me step out of my head and enjoy some fiction and non-fiction that has inspired and entertained and encouraged me a lot. It’s been a nice change of pace, and I’m looking for the balance between reading and writing – and sharing valuable, pertinent, fun information here.
It only took the whole month of January to get to this place. lol!
In the meantime, my mom & I are gearing up for another cookbook collaboration and that’s getting my creative juices flowing. With my crochet projects, I’m finding more to do with my hands, and we as a family are looking to do more meaningful things so we can do more with our hearts. More to come on that note…